Climate Change Rap

My Climate Change Rap debut at the 2012 Monterey Institute of International Studies Follies Talent Show. I’m 99.99% sure this experience was not replicated anywhere else that (or any) evening on Planet Earth. Watch the standup that preceded this gem here.

CLIMATE CHANGE RAP LYRICS

Human-caused global warming, I’m talking radiative forcing,
Get ready for this – it’s the climate change rap!

CHORUS

It’s a 9-11 call, we’re under attack,
Ecosystems everywhere about to collapse,
We’re headed for a cliff with no plans to stop,
Keep pumping that gas to the very last drop.

VERSE 1

Glaciers, polar bears, birds and bees,
gonna suffer the effects of this warming disease.
We think we’re cool cause we’ve got A/C,
But won’t be long til these Oncelers, can’t hide in their Thneeds.
The Lorax tried to warn us, we ignored the clues,
Now it’s time to anti up and start paying our dues.
Cause it’s a Double A Eaarth – have you heard the news?
Bill McKibben said it’s already too late to choose
Freedom’s just another word for nothing to lose.
But we’re keep turning up the heat, a nation of foolz.
Dinosaurs are gonna cause a second extinction.
We’re burning the oil and creating emissions
Choking to death on our fossil fuel addiction –
We know we should quit, but we won’t buy the prescription.
So we’re just headed for the cliff with no plans to stop,
Pumping that gas to the very last drop.

CHORUS

So it’s a 9-11 call, cause we’re under attack
Ecosystems everywhere about to collapse
We’re just lemmings on amphetamines headed for the cliff.
So buckle up and grab your climate change bucket list.

VERSE 2

You’re like Jessy, what’s on this bucket list? Well let me tell you…

Glaciers melting in the national parks –
Permafrost is gonna need a new trademark,
Kinda-sorta-sometimes frost isn’t the same
admit it or not, we’re changing the game.
And all these bogus politicians reppin’ for industry
Do they not believe in dinosaurs or understand history?
Or are they spinning their lies until they start to believe em?
Refuse to recognize that we’re changing the seasons
I’m searching for America’s road out of here, but
It’s blocked by the economy, jobs and fear.
We spent a trillion dollars for the oil in the soil,
Now we’re unemployed and choking on the recoil.
We could save the planet and go back to work,
But we need to get new priorities first,
Let’s build wind and solar panels, not SUVs
We could retrofit the nation and save some trees,

CHORUS

Cause it’s a 9-11 call, we’re under attack
Ecosystems everywhere about to collapse
We’re headed for a the cliff with no plans to stop,
Keep pumping that gas to the very last drop.

It’s a 9-11 call, we’re under attack
Ecosystems everywhere about to collapse
It’s a jihad on nature and we’re the terrorists
Better get started on your climate change bucket list.

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