In a previous post “Singapore, a Means of Comparison.” (See “older posts”). I wrote about my short stay in Singapore—on my way to Gujarat—and the harmonious coexistence of Singapore’s varying religious communities, relative to the comparatively dystopian atmosphere surrounding the religious communities of Gujarat, India. Although I still stand by the core argument that Singapore and Gujarat stand in contrast to each other, in terms of religious coexistence—because they do—an experience in Gujarat made me rethink what I had written.

I claimed that maybe “fate had taken me to Singapore to witness religious coexistence and tolerance, to have a means of comparison.” One very short conversation had forever changed how I define, and think about that central word, “tolerance.”

In Ahmedabad city, our group had the pleasure of interviewing a group of women from various NGOs. Along with their insights and fascinating stories, several women had brought various pamphlets which outlined the work of their respective organization, their mission, their philosophy and the quotes that guide them. One such quote quickly caught my attention: “We don’t want tolerance. We want space.” I immediately thought to myself “why wouldn’t an organization fighting against gender and religious discrimination want more tolerance?”

Puzzled, I asked the woman from that particular organization what “we don’t want tolerance” meant. She replied by rhetorically asking what was wrong with her and her community that others needed to tolerate. I had an epiphany, at that moment. “Of course” I thought “you tolerate a bad smell, you tolerate a baby crying in a movie theater, you tolerate long lines, basically, one only tolerates bad or annoying things.” I hadn’t thought of it that way before. Suddenly, I was outraged about every time I had ever heard someone preaching about religious tolerance or tolerance in general.

Although I am personally very doubtful of the many claims that religion and religious institutions are beneficial to a community and/or an individual, I would never claim that there is something inherently wrong with the community or individual; hoping they’d do the same for me, I’d give them the space to be who they are. In that way, “we want space” resonated with me; because, sure, I have to tolerate—the annoying/bad kind of tolerate—the occasional door-to-door missionary or a friend who is convinced I need a savior, but I ultimately have the space to be who I am and believe—or not believe—whatever I want.

However, for many in Gujarat, that kind of freedom is a luxury—if not non-existent. There is plenty of tolerance in Gujarat. But, minority religions, women, gays, lesbians, hijras, the lower castes are “tolerated,” until they’re not. That’s why Gujarat doesn’t need more tolerance; it needs more space.